That smile, that is so perfectly placed on your beautiful face, Makes me want to live my life at a slower pace. You're my world, even though we always fight. In the end, everything always turns out to be alright. You make me happy, you know it's true. I wouldn't be anywhere, If I hadn't met you. You're the sunshine on my cloudy days. When you talk to me, Everything is okay. I know I've hurt you, I know I've let you down. But if you give me another chance, I'll turn this all around. Your beauty, your grace, your smile. Comes to show I'd walk a thousand miles, just to know you'll stick around for awhile. I love you a lot, I'm begging you, to just give me one more shot.

My past is the past, and I live from it. you don't understand, how much I had to give for it. I lived with a druggie mom, and a deadbeat dad. Living with my siblings who were constantly sad. I never knew what was going on, When my mom was kidnapped and my dad was gone. I almost lost my mom that night, and until then- I've done nothing but fight. Fight for my right to survive in this place. For if it wasn't for her, I wouldn't be running this race, Our families overcome so much it's unreal. As a family we decided that we know how to feel. We're together, without the man who created us. Our dead beat dad, not with us? that's a plus. We're getting along just fine you know. Sometimes I wish You should just happen to show. Maybe say hi? Or even a goodbye, for I didn't hear shit, I just listened to you lie. I miss you, but it's come to show. I don't need you in my life, no more. this is the end, no more writing about you. Look how fucking good we're doing after all the shit you put us through? Just shows how lucky we really are. that we all didn't end up like you- sitting at the bar. Drinking your beers, and smoking your crack. Daddy did you know? your brain is fucking wack. you're destroying your life, before you even had a change to live with your family. Most people might agree, for I know now- you're nothing to me.

I'll be fine without you, I just want you, to be happy too. We were so close, but every living thing has to die. I didn't mean for it to hurt you, or by any means make you cry. You were the most important thing to me, I think it's time now, that I set you free. You don't have to worry about me holding you back. Or constantly making you feel as if you're having a panic attack. Forgive me for I tried, to be the best thing for you. When I told you, I'll always care- I promise I still do. I'll always love you, until the end. & in my heart, you'll always be; the perfect best friend.

Make me believe that I’m worth something, anything for I am done trying. I try to give myself hope, but it’s my body that keeps lying. You tell me to keep my head up. that’s what I’m trying to do. But It’s hard when I realize, all the stuff that I’ve gone through. I know that’s the past, yet it still lingers in my head. I’m tossing and turning, and screaming in my bed. Life’s like a roller coaster, when you get to the top- you drop- You travel down at maximum capacity unable to stop. When the rides over and you’re done living, It’s time to stop taking and learn to start giving. For you don’t have too long- Before your soul escapes your body and your mindless and gone. Live like today is gonna be your last, Because your life-span could care less about your past. Try to smile every now and then to show~ a different side of you, that no one else will know. Depression is just a crater in your journey. Don’t you see? If you put your mind to it, You’ll end up where you want to be.

I haven’t been able to write.
My emotions are too exhausted to fight.
I wish I could feel live again.
But there’s something- that keeps pulling me in.
My chaotic life has dulled down.
My exotic smile as turned into a frown.
My fucked up face, looks like a clown.

I scream with all my might,
But I cant make a sound.

I found my smile,
It’s been awhile.
I’ve been itching to feel this way for far too long.

My laughter has returned,
This depression has burned.
My life has become worth living, again.

I used to think there was nothing left to live for. I fought with my all, but there was just no more. I hated life, it was nothing but a bore. I know so much now, that I didn’t know before.

I was a monster. Adrenaline was pulsing through my veins. I tore out my insides, and on the ground lay my remains. My emotions were running faster than trains. You can tell, I had been crying. For on my cheeks there are stains.

I was the girl, who was pushed around.
Who fell to the ground.
Yet_ I never made a sound.

I’ve let you control me for far too long. You forced my emotions through battles of ping-pong. What you made me feel was wrong. In the end you were defeated,


My depression is gone.

I don’t like the way we live.
How we get nothing in return- but all we do is give.
No one has respect, just pouring out lies.
No more ‘Hello’s.’ Just painful ‘Goodbyes.’
I want to be the one, who changes society.
When people don’t have to question propriety.
I rant too much- no one cares.
I scream my thoughts- and get hurtful stares.
I’m just trying to get through to you.
So you can see what I have become, and how much I have grew.
From a child I was careless- Wild, yet free.
Now look at me. what do you see?
A teenager hurting, from all the tears she has cried.
One who has a mother, who hasn’t ever tried.
A young girl with dreams she thinks she cant achieve.
One who gets hurt- From wearing her heart on her sleeve.


You’re my mom, you should know what you’re reading is true.
Is it hard to take in- that I want some love from you?